I'm still here...

So this is awkward, Ive had such a break I almost don't know how to blog anymore. I didn't make a conscious decision to step away from my blog, it just sorta happened. I was beginning to feel better and that was great, but I was still suffering from extreme fatigue and the blogging was the part which had to go.

Having been on a new set of anti-depressants since February, I can finally say I am beginning to see a massive improvement in myself and others are no noticing too. I would say within the past 5 weeks I have felt more stable and in the last 2 I have seen a improvement in my energy and mood. I can't explain how good this makes me feel, I've been on anti-depressants since September and I have suffered with clinical depression since last January without even accepting it. As well as anxiety and stress.

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Now that I am starting to feel part of life again, I can see (finally) how far I have come and the strength which I have shown. Feeling like I was making progress was something I could not do, but now I have the big step I can see it. I feel like I am in life now and not just watching it pass me by. I can't say I will be back to blogging with the frequency I once was. But I will be blogging when I feel like I can. 

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Part of getting myself better is not placing expectations on myself and then feeling disappointed when I can not meet them. As much as I love blogging, I have to apply it to this as well. All parts of my life, whether it's work, fun times, shopping etc. I have to  set boundaries. Small steps at a time.

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I hope everyone in the land of blogging is well and I look forward to getting back into things!

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NYC bound!

This is it folks... by the time this posts I should be well on my way to NYC via Toronto?! Don't ask! To say I am feeling anxious is an understatement. It will not be an easy journey alone but I know my fabulous BFF - Miss Faux Fur - will be waiting for me! Also, I have travelled Australia, America and Canada alone so this should be a breeze. Just the little issues of depression and anxiety to deal with but I well medicated! I look forward to sharing my times when I return!

I heart NYC!

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What I like... gif style!

Here are a few of my favourite things... gif style!!

Chocolate - I have lost count of the number of times I have tried to lessen my intake but I always fail miserably. I crave the stuff. 

I do, I do... [Source]

Blogging - I love blogging. I get to share my thoughts and feelings with all you fabulous bloggers. I also love being able to read all your comments and reply. I have made some good friends blogging, it's a supportive community.

I love a good blog event ... [Source]

Trashy TV - I love nothing better than getting wrapped up on the sofa and watching trashy TV shows. Many people will judge TV viewing habits but I just don't care. I love some trashy TV and that's that. Breaking Amish and Honey Boo Boo anyone?

Don't we all Honey Boo Boo? [Source]

Finding things out - I have quite a thirst for information and knowledge. I like to know things. If I watch a movie, the first thing I do is go onto IMDB and read up on the actors and actresses, the trivia and message boards. If I am told something I will research all there is to know about it. 

When you gotta know, you gotta know! [Source]

Working out - I have toyed with many different types of workouts through the years. My favourites would have to be ballet, pole, boxercise and yoga. As you can see I am more of a class kinda girl. The idea of motivating myself in the gym doesn't really do it for me at all. I love to get the endorphins going and I like the challenge of new moves. 

Oh to workout like Penny... [Source]

I wanna back my azz up this week to a song which is on my favourite album of the moment - Simple Songs by The Shins (Album - Port of Morrow).

What do you like? Are there any other chocolate loving, trash tv watching, blogging, information craving, fitness fanatic out there?


Linking up with :

Why pole dance?

Today I have linked up with Pole Freaks blog, my first article has been featured which I want to share with you all too!
 
When people ask me why I pole dance, I want to answer – Why not? There are so many things I love which keep me pole dancing: enjoyment, challenge, toning and empowerment! I started pole dancing about 4 years ago (with a break in between) and on my first lesson I was unsure, like most people, of what to expect. The first move I was taught was the fireman’s spin. Nervously, I stepped up to the pole, full of excitement for my new workout. On my first spin I was hooked!
I loved my first lesson, regardless of the couple of bruises which developed. This was the main factor which led to me going to the next lesson. I had fun. I loved swinging around the pole and the enjoyed the challenge. From being younger I danced and this was a new challenge. My body ached and I liked that ache. I hadn’t found a workout which I not only enjoyed, but which worked muscles I never knew I had. I even began to make friends in the class.

Smile!
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The challenge is definitely something which keeps me going back to pole dancing. I picked up the first few moves easily; I think this was partly due to the enjoyment of the classes but also my dancing background.  It is the only workout which I feel has ever really challenged me. After developing my ability to spin, I began with inverts and this was where pole dancing became really challenging for me.  I would spend weeks on a new move. I saw people stop dancing when they reached the inverts – but not me. I kept at it; I pushed myself harder than I had ever pushed myself. I knew I would feel proud of myself when I finally managed the move which I spent weeks perfecting.  After all this time, I still get that rush when I perfect a new move.

Through pole dancing, my body has toned brilliantly. My core strength is strong and my arm muscles are toned and defined. It always surprises people how much their body can change taking part in pole dancing.  I for one was amazed at how my arms shaped up and even when I have taken a break from working out, it’s a matter of weeks before my arm muscles develop again. The core strength develops so naturally, there are very few exercise routines which involve holding your own body weight. This helps out with my overall toning and balance.

Yep...I can do that!

My final reason for continuing pole dancing is the way it makes me feel. I always leave the lessons feeling strong and empowered as a woman. I am well aware of the connotations of pole dancing. Especially when men find out what I do for a workout, they think I am some kind of stripper. I am past the point of trying to explain it to them now. I just let them think what they want, knowing I am probably much stronger than them! I feel empowered as a woman at the strength my body has and some of the tricks which I can now do on a pole!

So, if you’re thinking about giving it a go. My only advice is to go for it! It is something which I have been hooked on now for years and love how it makes me feel. Good luck and get spinning!

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Nearly 100...

Today I want to tell you about one of my favourite bloggers. She's Rebecca at Forever after Undecided and is currently living in LA via Germany. She is not only a fabulous blogger but also a great friend of mine. Since meeting in this little blogging world we call home, we have become quite the BFF's.

After a brief hiatus from blogging while she worked super hard on her law work, she has returned with a brand new, sparkly blog and is ready to mingle once again! She is one shy of 100 so I thought I'd give here a little help.  

So if you're feeling like you want to read a super blogger, head to Miss Rebecca and enjoy and show some blog love.

I'm back...

It has been such a long time since blogging. I feel new to it all over again!! My trip was great and I arrived back home last Friday. I unfortunately had jet lag catch up with me so I took another couple of days off to get pulled around. I have to say I have coped better with jet lag this time than ever before....Is that a sign?! I had a stressful start to the holiday with the usual half term illness. I also decided to work on the fight over there. I got loads done but it wasn't fun writing. I will say that my holiday sparked my writing off again. I wrote loads (in fact I carried my notebook around just in case inspiration struck at any time) and have continued that since getting back. How much will make it to my blog? I don't know...it's just nice to be enjoying it!!

My holiday was a lot more relaxed than any other I've been on to NYC. Since I've done most of the main 'touristy' activities I was able to stroll and just take in the city more. Luck would have it that I got to take the city in, in glorious sunshine!!! I got to wear the daisy dukes Texa - wooo!!!!

I ventured to Williamsburg in Brooklyn, lounged in Central Park and wandered along Park Avenue. I was also lucky enough to visit the Met (first time) to view the Alexander McQueen exhibit. I have to say that it was some of the most amazingly beautiful yet dark work I've ever had the pleasure of viewing up close. The rooms were all themed and had noises and holograms everywhere, along with many quotes. The guy was talented and clearly loved the female form. He took pride in making woman look strong and powerful. Check out this link if you want a glimpse of Alexander McQueen: Savage Beauty.

 

It's getting harder to leave the city each time I go. I know that it could never be a place which I call 'home' but it would definitely be an adventure. The more time you spend in New York, the more you see past the lights and buildings and really see the people who live there. It struck me at one point that the majority of people walk around the city are alone. Whether they're going to work, school, hanging out etc.Even when walking with Miss Faux Fur it was hard to stay together. It was like some magical force field pulling us apart. Friends I met said they have maybe 2 close friends and everyone else is just 'someone they know'. If you know this before going there long term it's fine but I couldn't imagine someone turning up with no knowledge.It's a city which can toughen you up, burn you out but can introduce you to so many unusual and interesting people. Some of whom you feel like you could have a real friendship with, others you need to feel wary of them.

This sounds like I'm being negative towards my (and Rebecca's) favourite city. I'm not. I'm just seeing it in reality. It's like the final scene of The Wizard of Oz- the curtain is lifting and the lies are being exposed. I feel like I have a closer bond with the city now, I've found out a secret which not many people know. It is and always will be a city full of so many memories and hopefully at some point an adventure which will toughen me up and give me things to tell my grandkids about in the future.

I ♥ New York City....still.... 

 

What I've learnt...

Myself and Miss Faux Fur spent a whole day out and about yesterday, we went to a museum, shopping, bar and then crashed out watching a film with me peddling all my various beauty products. I have a calrins skincare counter in my room as well as various nail and moisturisers haha!! Could we be any cooler than sitting watching Eclipse with HydraQuench Clarins face mask and pizza? I think not!

Things I've learnt this weekend...

- Museums are such fun places.

- Interactive museum displays are the most fun.

- Miss Faux Fur is not team anyone on Twilight...she's just 'Team Boys'. (Team Edward all the way for me!Although I still appreciate Jacob haha!)

- Some men are romantic still (after being regaled by stories from random guy in a bar).

- Sometimes men go into a black hole due to trying to do the right thing (according to guy in bar after being quizzed by Miss Faux Fur haha!)

- Some Topshop dresses don't look right one anyone.

- What I thought were just very fine lines around my lines are actually dehydration lines- hence the film and Hydra Quench mask.

- Myself and Miss Faux Fur can waste hours in a bar drinking coke (I was designated driver) and half lager and limes.

- I still get excited at the prospect of going to the pictures (Off to see Mr Pattinson in Water for Elephants today). Who doesn't love pick&mix and trailers for new films?!
- I must drink more boring water.
- Myself and Miss Faux Fur are good at saving money before our next trip away- hence the movie night in.


Even though it's not that sunny where I am I wanted to share a song which always makes me feel sunny - even when it was snowy this did the trick :-)

Labrinth- Let The Sunshine

 

Egg rolling fun...

My family has a bit of a tradition of going up to a local monument and rolling decorated eggs down the hill on Easter Sunday. We like to say it's for the kids but I think some of the adults enjoy the egg decorating more!! So I want to share some of the designs from the day:

Miss Twin's eggs- Rabbit and 2-Pac!

Cousin's eggs- Ballerina and The Hulk!

Mine- Justin Bieb-egg and Sir Reginald the Peacock.

Brother's egg- I couldn't remember the name but it's cute!

Nephew's egg- A little guy with headphones!

Justin Bieb-egg didn't make it up the hill :-(

The hill....

Us scavenging for our eggs!

View from the very top.

'Wildlife' grazing around the monument haha!

It was Miss Twin's egg which survived the most throws with Sir Reginald coming a close 2nd. As you can see Justin Bieb-egg suffered a cruel fate before the rolling commenced. I had a fly land on my hand which I thought was a spider and unfortunately in the panic I flicked my hand and sent him flying  :-( It was a sad moment to me but one of great amusement to the others. 

After our hill fun, we all got together to eat, talk and laugh. It has been a lovely Easter Sunday! Hope you have all had fun too!!!

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My Road trip with VLOG...

As it was Good Friday myself and Miss Faux decided to go on a sunny road trip. As you are all aware, we have been having some unseasonably nice weather in the UK this week. Therefore it was summer outfits, sunglasses and a trip to Whitby which we planned. All I can say is that it was a major FAIL. 

There was no sunshine in Whitby, there was fog...in fact so much fog that we couldn't see anything. What kind of day trip was that?We had lunch to decide what to do and my animal attraction continued. In the pub we went into the were at least 6 dogs. I like to think it was the place itself was a little weird as there was a man who looked like Santa (on his off time) and also a discussion about how many mushrooms someone had stitchedtogether (it was 9 if you must know).Needless to say we didn't really feel like sticking around so we decided to drive up the coast to Scarbourgh and visit a friend who assured us there was sun there. 

By the time we arrived, Mr Sunshine had been chased away by more fog! We made the most of it and persisted...we made it to the fair and it became a little sunnier...woo!! I thought I would share a few pics from our trip.

Isn't the weather glorious?

Us with Sir Reginald and his mates...

BOO!

Yea...I'm loving this....

On the way home I manged to get lost after I pronounced proudly, "Woo... Just a straight road and we're home now!" Typical! Before that little 'mishap' of mine me and Miss Faux Fur decided to film the fog (just in case it swallowed us and we died, then people would know our last movements). Just want to let you know that I was actually paying attention to the road and not just pointing out awful looking buildings...

Our day trip ended with me serenading Miss Faux Fur with various pop/rap songs till we arrived home. Lucky isn't she? Needless to say none of those serenades are VLOG worthy haha!

Tee off...

Birdie! Eagle! Fore!!! 

Yep...Get me- I know some golf stuff haha!! All I knew about golf was from the Wii and that hockey players enjoy it- I didn't know if he was any good but he liked it haha! After work I attended an after school teachers course to deliver golf to the kids. We looked at how to make it fun, develop skills and change difficultness. The teachers there all had to take part and it was exactly what the kids would do. I know why kids love PE lessons so much!! They get to talk to friends, play sports and also do something new.

Peace and quiet?

It has given me quite a taste for the sport though. I don't like watching it but the idea of playing it seems fun. It takes so much concentration but in a good way! Maybe once I get my knee sorted it could be something I would look into.Always looking for new things. I can't imagine it would be too bad for my knee either!

Any other golf fans?

Waiting...

I was in the middle of a lesson today, and as usual, my kids were being random. One decided to tell me he was going to a disco tonight and last time he went he waited two hours to get his face painted white, with Man U wrote in gold across his forehead. I then asked him 'Was it worth it?'...expecting him, as a child, to be extremely enthusiastic about it and he replied no.

First off I was impressed that this child had waited two whole hours to get it done (which in kid speak is like 30 minutes if that) and secondly that he actually didn't think it was worth it. If you have ever worked with kids, you will know that they pretty much find everything exciting...particularly face painting.

It worried me, as, as an adult there are not many things which we would wait around for. But we're adults you know...we have lost that naivety and excitement which children have. Had he grown into a mini adult? Had he finally realised that not many things are worth waiting 2 hours for (except something like a McDonald's the day after the night before)? Or maybe the face paint was just crap...which is probably the most obvious answer. But, as I sat and watched him still laugh about it, I got to thinking how old will he be when he finally becomes a little adult and he sees the world in such a different way. I suppose as adults our views of the world are constantly changing and we pretty much understand how and why things may change. I've forgotten what it was like when I was a kid. When everything you saw was funny, you liked anything, you had no fear and things on the news were not things you fully understood.

I like seeing my kids like that, they are still kids and still have that love for life. They are happy nearly all the time and if not it doesn't take them long to come around again. It makes me feel extremely privileged to be able to do the job I do and educate these children about life and hopefully help them become ready for the challenges and changes that lie ahead.

ABC's....not the only thing I teach at school....