Life of a Sport's Wife

Today I am introducing you to a new sidebar sponsor. It's time to welcome Jessa from 'Life of a Sport's Wife' to my blog. If you sports, pink and working out you will love this lady! Jessa has a wonderful little family and likes to share her life with you all. 

Take it away Jessa!

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Fun Facts!

1. My favorite color is PINK!!!

2. I am super organized, and don't go anywhere without my planner (I would be lost without it).

3. I could spend all day in IKEA. 

4. I own my Etsy store, Pearls N Stitches - yes, that is my shameless plug! I love my store because I get to be creative and what I really love to do which is being crafty.

Me and the hubby!

This holiday I am looking forward to starting to create our own traditions. I don't know why but I have been in a sappy holiday mood. I want to have holiday traditions to pass down to our kids. Right now the only kid we have is our 4 legged furbaby, Heisman Barkley.

Other posts you will love from Jessa 

About Jessa

Simple Pleasures

I'm an official blogger  

Bottoms Up 

Find Jessa here:

 Twitter/ BlogLovin'/ Facebook 

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Hope you enjoy getting to know Jessa and stop by her blog to say 'Hi!'.

This weekend will be a busy one for me. I am officially starting Christmas shopping - late, I know! But, me and Miss Twin are heading to the shops to get cracking on our rather long list - ho!ho!ho! I also have a few episodes of 'Friday Night Lights' to catch up on. About halfway through Series 5 now. Just to ease the pain of holiday stress here is a picture of Mr Tim Riggins for all you fans out there (he's not in S5, so this is for me as much as you guys):

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What is there to live for?

Since suffering from depression (before and after diagnosis), I have had my fair share of 'down days', as I affectionately call them. These days bring a feeling which is difficult to describe. I can't get out of bed and when I do, I only make it as far as the sofa. It is almost like some black cloud is hanging over me, following me wherever I go. I don't feel positive and I also question my life and things around me. Sometimes I dislike myself with feelings of worthlessness. 

What is the point? This is a common question I ask myself on these 'down days'. But, I have never thought I'd be better off not being in this world. That is something I can't say I have fully experienced. Once or twice I have thought about what it would be like if I wasn't here but never that I would do anything to myself. I always hope I will never get so far to do anything like that to myself.

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These kind of days are difficult to deal with, even more so when they are so often that I am surprised when I have a good day. But this can crash down so quickly you don't even realise. The darkness becomes the reality in which I live in. 

So how do I cope? Well, since the introduction of anti-depressants, I have began to feel the down days are outnumbered by the good days. I have also had to look around me to find the reasons to live. Now this isn't a big, grand scheme of my place in this world. It's the little things.

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In our lives, we all move so fast and are so easily made to think thoughts and ideas from the media around us. We are told what is 'normal' and we take in everything we are given. So much so, that in this whirlwind of life, we begin to miss the little things. The things which we almost take for granted or even in some cases, neglect to see or experience. 

Finding these 'little things' again, has taken me some time. In a life where I threw myself into work for a number of reasons and had the black cloud of depression following me, these became difficult to see. In recent weeks, I have ended my days by recording what I am thankful for in that day. Sometimes, this can be difficult - but by doing so I have been able to start opening my eyes up to the things which I have not seen for some time. I am looking for them and becoming more aware of these things in my life. I am appreciating them and being thankful that I am lucky to have them.

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On the down days, I struggle and search harder. But each time it shows me, there is always something there to live for. Something to be thankful or happy about. We may not be able to choose happiness (believe me, I am not exactly turning it away) but we can try and find it when it's gone. Forget what we are told to like and not like, find your own little things.

How do you make sure you don't forget the 'little things' in life?

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Therapy - Take Two

Earlier this year I went to my first therapy session. I did not have a positive experience. Having studied Psychology and very nearly pursued a career in it, I had a fair idea of the process and I know how helpful it can be.

However, after two CBT (Cognitive Behaviour Therapy) sessions I realised it was not for me. This was partly due to the therapist themselves and also the fact that being told what to do does not suit me at all. I don't like being told what to and CBT really pushes those boundaries. 

So, I left it. Then, when I finally accepted my depression for what it was and after all other tests came back fine I decided it was time to look back into it. Instead of going through the local surgery to find a therapist, I found my own. When I went for my first session I was apprehensive to say the least. After all, the last time had been a difficult time (I managed 4 sessions). As soon as we both sat down and she talked, I knew straight away she was someone I was going to be comfortable with. 

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Not just her, the environment was warm and calming. The candles and essence were inviting and the room felt like a normal home. During the first session I discussed my past year and a half with her which brought her to tears. She discussed how she feels emotions and was trained in Humanistic therapy. If needed we could dip into CBT but that our sessions would be led by whatever comes up. 

I returned the following session, still full of nerves and talked away. We discussed many things and I have to say, as much as I felt comfortable, I avoided and brushed over certain things. Sharing is not my strong point! That's not to say those things won't be brought up at some point, some things just need time. But, I am pretty open with her. 

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I have now been visiting her for about 5 weeks and it is going really well. Being able to talk to an 'outsider' is nice and allows me to feel like I am not a burden to them. The nerves before the session have not gone and each week she challenges me and thought process. But it I am comfortable with her. Uncomfortable with the focus on myself sometimes but comfortable with her. I am not sure if this will be something that I continue for some time or whether I cut sessions less as I begin to feel brighter. But for now, it is definitely helping me in a little way and that's all that matters. 

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Pinterest Inspiration - Life

I have had a bit of an up and down week just gone. My down days are becoming fewer and less intense and my good days are feeling clearer and brighter. This is keeping my hope going and helping me to have the patience and strength I need to get through this time. 

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Do you have any wise words of inspiration to stay strong?

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Friday Favourite - The Office

Just a quick post today - I just wanted to share something which has been making me laugh and keep my spirits up the last couple weeks when I have felt like doing anything else but laugh.

The Office: An American Workplace

Me and Miss L absolutely LOVE this show. We have nights in watching it and I can honestly say it makes me genuinely smile and laugh. Why? Well the dynamics between the cast is amazing, the facial expressions are genuinely what you would expect in the circumstances that happen, the individualism of each character and Steve Carrell as Michael Scott.

I want to share some of my favourite parts with you and say if you've never seen it - get on it! Also, persist, at first Miss L was not a fan and now, she is hooked too!

  

Do you love The Office? What is your favourite moment?