I on the other hand, have dated many guys, not been able to say I love you and had my heart broken at least twice. The latest time was actually yesterday. After not hearing from Mr Canadian for a couple weeks, we caught up last night and it turns out he is seeing someone casually now. This was a bit of a blow to me to be honest.
I haven't really gone into too much detail with him but we dated a few years back, kept in touch when he returned to Canada, lost touch for a year, rekindled contact and been in contact ever since so at least 2 1/2 years. It was daily contact, flirting, talking about what we would do if we visited and basically it felt like a long distance relationship.
We both skirted round the visiting issue and as you all know I have not had the easiest couple years. So last night's revelation was pretty much a slap in the face. I don't know what I expected but I didn't expect that. Having confided in him with my depression I feel like that has made him not be as bothered about me. I know this would not be the case and in the past when I've pushed him away saying if he needs a break from me that's fine, he's always said no and persisted in keeping contact with me.
However, I am so fragile right night, that is the first thought. It upsets me and I wonder if I have just been a silly girl to read too much into things or whether I have just been 'played' ? Am I not attractive enough for him?
I don't know, all I can say is that today, the day of love, I am feeling pretty loveless in the romantic sense and having to deal with a 'faux break-up' is not easy for me. Mr Canadain does not think we need to have time away from each other and no contact because we're friends, I have explained that I am hurt and that I always thought there was something between us. I think he wants his cake and wants to eat it!
To move to a positive note, I am spending time with my girl love!! She is visiting for a night in with pizza, The Office and good chatter. I may not have a man in my life but I have amazing friends and for that I am extremely grateful!
Happy love day to you all - cherish those who give you love and support all year round.
I also want to say a BIG thank you to all those who linked up their blog! I will be visiting each and every one to find new blog buddies! I think it's definitly something I would love to do again.
Images from: Pinterest
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