Crashing down to reality.

Lately I have been feeling a lot better in myself which is great. Maybe it is something to do with my summer holidays - teacher perks - or maybe things are just getting better.

At least that is what I thought. I have found my sleeping patterns starting to dwindle again, my insomnia is coming back bad. I can be super tired but unable to sleep and calm my mind. I have tried all sorts, baths before bed, soothing candles, busy days but nothing is working. I have found my breathing difficult too, I have a tightness in my chest which just makes me struggle. I find this frustrating.

I have been working hard on my fitness routine lately and upped my pole routines to 2 hours a week as well as peppering in short home workouts. I have had some awesome sessions and I am really starting to feel the benefit. I have not tried another exercise (and I have done many) which tones my body in the way which pole does. But today I have had a bad session when just things weren't going my way. I can't get my new move, I am aching from the session but not in a good way.

This whole feeling is starting to remind me of my lower iron days. I know my levels have not dropped as low as they were but they have dropped again. This is what concerns me, I hope this is not the start of the slippery slope back to where I was. I don't know how I can manage this but I will try. I feel alone with it all, I can't describe the feeling I have with the fatigue and the brain fog. It's difficult.Short post today from me, and not the most up beat but I'm just having a few of those days.

How I feel about now... trying to keep it together. [Source]

How do you pick yourself up when your feeling down? Any advice would be good!

4 days and counting...

I am in my final week of school before the two week Easter break and boy do I need it?! I finished reports today and I'm now moving onto assessments. It seems at the moment that something which should take half an hour seems to take 3 times as long and I'm now feeling extremely worn... it's not helping that today I was up at 6.30am working as couldn't keep working at 1 this morning. I actually totaled up my hours work last week and came up with the ridiculous amount of :  68 hours!!!!! 

This is including working through my lunch break, working up until bed and then I accompanied some older kids to a swimming gala on the Friday night and didn't get home till after 9pm!!

I know you're wondering what my secret is to keeping going...I don't know though! When I look at it from an outside view I just have no idea how I or any of my teacher friends manage it?! I wonder if teachers are superheros develop this ability to not need sleep or food the last couple of weeks of term in order to get through assessment weeks (as well as the ability to ignore loud noise). Now I have 4 days left, I can feel my body slowing down wanting to sleep. However, I don't listen to such nonsense and keep on going.

As treat today I was a bit naughty and went to McDonalds drive through after work. I know it's not good for you but sometimes it's all you need. However, the weather then seemed to mirror my feelings: it was bright sunshine but a heavy rain shower at the same time. It's like not even the weather can feel properly happy! However, it did provide me with the following photo which I just love!

It's a rainbow!!!! :-)

So pretty...

I am well aware that this post is a little all over the place...blame the sleep deprivation! I can't keep thoughts on one track on a good day let alone when I'm feeling shattered.

Hope you have all had a good start to the week!

That Thursday feeling...

I know you're all sitting thinking... ah that popular saying, 'That Thursday feeling...'. I joke, you're probably wondering what on earth I'm on about. This however, seems to be something which is happening every week. Since going back to work after Christmas, my weeks just seem to go so slow!! Whenever it hits Thursday, it feels like Friday. Why? Why? Why? 

I started getting a bad tension headache about 11 today and it just continued ALL day! All I wanted to do was leave school and head out for a massage!! Unfortunately I think leaving my kids alone in the classroom all day is kinda frowned upon?! So I just put up with it and spent my lunch break rubbing my shoulders and trying to feel better. When the kids left, I sat and marked 120 books!!!!! It was tick, tick, stamp, tick and comment. I felt like I had developed RSI after them all. I then decided I was going to go home... As I was walking out I got hit by the Thursday feeling again!! I had this overwhelming feeling of tiredness and thought it was Friday. Not a happy bunny at all when a split second later I realised "Aw man it's Thursday!"

So with that I trundled home, gorged on chocolate and was very British with my cup of tea. How do I feel now? Tired, worn out, headachey and tight in my neck. I just want to be stretched out completely! It's not helping that I have my injured knee stopping me from doing any exercise so no yoga, dancing or running. That means I feel like this tight knot of stressful energy now. 

Now I just have to work hard, through the tiredness and hope that I can meet my weekly Project: Do Me goal of finishing work before 9 to relax. 

Hope everyone is getting on well with their Project: Do Me list. Follow link below to find out what it is all about.

One day left till the weekend guys...keep going :-)