The past few days have seen me burnt out in the form of migraines and headaches. If you've never had a migraine before, feel lucky. They are like someone is inside your head and hammering your eye and head. It truly is an excruciating pain and I am always sick with them too. The day after is just as bad as I suffer from another headache and a very fuzzy head which hurts with every movement. But guess what... I still went to work.
Needless to say my past few days have been very tough and I know this is my body telling me to slow down. I have therefore spent the last two nights doing no school work while all the time feeling guilty about it. However, a thought hit me tonight:
The world has not ended, everyone of my kids is still learning and happy and I am not feeling so tired.So what was I worried about?
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| I am sure it didn't look like this when I went to bed... |
The older I am getting, the more I am realising I find it difficult to find a 'stop' point. If I stop;
Will something go wrong?
Will I be thought less of?
Will I appear incompetent?
Will I become a bad teacher?
Questions like these appear in my mind when I begin to slow down. I have such an internal battle and think that I will not be good enough.
Obviously, the hours I work are detrimental to my health. Never will anyone, in their final moments, ever say, "I wish I had worked more." This is something which I should keep in my mind when I am working away at 1am. I need to get working on myself and my own life. My kids at school are happy, the teaching is there and the work is being done. By making myself burnout I will not help anyone, let alone myself.
How do you cope when you can't find your 'stop' moment?
I also want to add a link to a fabulous 'link and mingle' over at Yellow Umbrella:
