However, someone decided to push me and test me to the limits. I departed my home city late due to weather, ran for my connecting flight in the next airport. This was no fun and needless to say I was not looking or feeling my best when I arrived at the gate but I'd done it. I dealt with the stress and settled into the flight.
My next one saw me fly to Toronto where I would then fly a short journey to NYC. As I settled and put all my in flight needs into the pocket in front of me I suddenly began to realise that we were not anywhere near taking off time. How could that be when I had to do an airport dash? I looked around and the crew were just wandering. Then came the announcement - We will be delayed due to technical difficulties with the wing. Seriously?! Yep, they were serious. When we took off we were half an hour late, as I calculated this with my connection time I began to panic that my next flight would be another airport dash. But luckily, my prescribed Diazepam (Valium) kicked in and I managed to get a few hours sleep.
Two hours before the end of the flight I awoke with a horrific headache and began to panic. I couldn't figure out why, I just knew my head was in pain, I felt sick and I had no paracetamols with me. When you're taking Valium it's not something you think you'll need! So I worked my way to the air stewardess at the back of the plane and asked for some. She gave me the tablets and my panic rose it's head. I began to shake and I could feel the tears building. The stewardess came back to me to check and realising I was not doing well, sat me on the jump seat.
We talked and she gave me sugar water which she said helped one of her friends during attacks. Brought me tissues and sent other passengers back to seats to allow me space alone. She and another stewardess continued to check on me and comfort me throughout the rest of the flight. Even walking me back to my seat at the end. When I told my doctor this she replied, "Oh Missy, that's when you should have taken a diazepam to help too."
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| Yea, not just the fringe I have in common with Zooey now... [Source] |
As I left the flight I realised that I was cutting it short but felt relaxed again until I realised I had to collect my luggage in Toronto and take it to the bag drop (a 25 min walk) through Canadian immigration and American immigration. When I reached the bag tagging area I was told I had missed my flight - no really?! I didn't know! Booked onto another and sent on my way, after being told I did not have an ESTA - which of course I did. Hello, severely depressive with high anxiety is going to have her document and stick to the rules. Cue more panic when approaching US Customs. Of course, all was fine and I was through, bag dropped and used that time to find a spot at a bar, have some food, and have random strangers strike up conversation. It's accent - gets people every time when I'm travelling!
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| They all want to hear me talk [Source] |
So, needless to say that's the first time I've ever missed a flight, had a panic attack mid flight and needed Valium just to get through a day. I could have sat and cried - believe me, I wanted to do that in Toronto airport, in fact, I didn't want to actually leave Toronto airport - but I didn't. I kept going and kept strong. I decided to look at it as showing me that I am still capable of doing things at the moment and also I am able to work through the anxiety, even when alone.
Have you ever had a travel issue which has made you realise how strong you were?
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