Home Sweet Home...

I have BIG news today... yep, it is that big I need the help of caps!  I have been waiting to share this new for some time but it was finally sorted last week.

As of Friday, I am now officially a home owner. I purchased my first property all by myself. That's right, I am a single lady doing it for myself.It has come at a time when a 'project' is something I welcome in my life. I have already been in to start painting. 

I will be keeping you all updated in the 'transofrmation' as I go. Today I want to share a few images from my new home...

Says it all ...

I purchased the paints and cleaning products which are taking residence in the living area for the moment as I work my way around the home.

All the tools for the job...

Today I was having a peek out my widow only to see.... a squirrel!!! How cute is that?

Spot my new friend...

I will be updating more as the flat turns into a home.  Hopefully this will be the start of an exciting new chapter in my life after all the sadness and heartbreak after last year.

What would your advice be for me starting a new home?

Facts of Me ...

Today I am linking up with Whitney at 'I Wore Yoga Pants To Work'. It's a post all about me ... Do we have anything in common?

Fact 1

The older I get, the higher the standards I gain. This is true from work, to home etc. I would never say they were particularly low but I definitely aim very high now. Sometimes to my own detriment.

Fact 2
I love quotes. Simple as that. When I was at University it was the days of MSN Messenger and I constantly had lyrics as my status. This made me known as 'The Lyrics Queen'.  Quotes make me me think and ponder life. I can easily lose myself for hours reading them.

Fact 3
Music is a passion - I can't play an instrument but that's irrelevant. I always listen to music. In fact, I think I listen to more music than I watch TV most weeks. My favourite is discovering a new artist and being obsessed with them. I still remember the day The Killers 'Hot Fuss' came out, I played that record on repeat for months. As of late The Lumineers have kept me entertained.

"I'm like the Dead Sea... you told me I was like the Dead Sea, you'd never sink when you are with me..."

Fact 4
I am fiercely protective of my family and friends. When I make friends with someone they have me forever. Unless they hurt me or treat me unfairly they will always have me on their side. I will do anything for them.

Fact 5
I over flow with empathy. I feel like I physically hurt when friends and family around me do. I have been told, and would agree, that I am very perceptive. This has its positives but it also means I feel everything.

{Source}

Fact 6
I love to travel. I went from being a homebody to an independent traveller. It started a couple years back when I met a guy and was inspired to see me and be more independent. From short trips with Miss Faux Fur to NYC where I would wander, to travelling America and Canada and then last Summer visiting Australia, I have itchy feet. Due to my job I am limited to the times I can travel but I make the most of it. It gives me freedom and allows me to meet new people.

Fact 7
Clothes and shoes are a weakness of mine. I don't crave ridiculously expensive clothes and shoes, I just crave any! I love picking up a bargain here and there and pairing it with older outfits to feel new. Dresses are my down fall and I will always fall for pretty dresses and classic LBDs. One is not enough for me.

Fact 8
I love my job. I am a teacher and I make a difference. The children listen and learn well. I see them grow into mature young adults and they spend as much time with me as their parents sometimes. I am like a surrogate mother to all 29 in my class at the moment. In school I am known as 'the nurturer' due to my calm manner.

Fact 9
I have zero common sense and this is the source of great amusement for others on many occasions. My mind is scatty and therefore quite often I say things without thinking and mind wander all over the place. But sometimes it's nice to be in my own little world and not be right on it. It keeps me entertained.

Fact 10
When I feel panic while driving I turn my music down. I can't concentrate and find it off putting. So if I'm lost? Volume down!


I am also on Twitter if you want to follow and get to know me even better!

What fact would you share? Do we have anything in common?

Colour Blocking : Guest Post

Today I have something a little different, a guest post from a new favourite blogger of mine. Miss Tiffany from Pinstriped Penguin! After she contacted me to guest post I was very excited to work for her. I hope you enjoy the post (I did- I am a huge fan of colour blocking!) and head over Pinstriped Penguin to read my post for the day and more on fashion!So please show some love today...

______________________________________________________________

Hello Everyone! My name is Fanny and I write the Pinstriped Penguin! I am so excited to be guest posting for Missy today :) I write a little about fashion, food, crafts, weddings, etc. etc. This list goes on and on. 

I decided to share a little fashion with you guys today.

Color blocking, have you heard of it? I can't say I truly knew what it meant until just recently. Here's one of the definitions I found on the web, it explains it pretty well.

Color blocking is a technique where blocks of various fabrics are sewn together to create clothing with a few different solid colors...

So, there you have it! Color blocking was huge for Fall/Winter 2012/13, and don't expect it to go anywhere for Spring 2013. The trend can be found everywhere, from handbags and swimsuits to casual wear. Here are a few pictures I found of the trend on the runway and in real life.

I find this to be a very easy trend to follow. Just mix and match different color clothes and you've got it!

I found this shirt on sale for $10-$12 at Kohl's just recently. It was part of their Narciso Rodriguez designer line. Pair that with with some black skinnies or even dress pants and you've got a trendy outfit for work :)

First, let's get some things straight. I am not a model, nor is my husband a professional photographer - don't judge!! I also didn't have any make up on *sigh*

I didn't want to add too much jewelry to this outfit. The color blocking can be a lot sometimes, so simple is better. Some large retro black studs, a couple of bangles and my watch. Classic enough for work, yet still keeping that trendy vibe.

What do you guys think about color blocking? Do you see yourself getting into this trend for Winter or Spring?

Link Ups

See you later...

Today was the burying of my brother's ashes. I felt prepared for the small service and arrived feeling somewhat ok. However, it all became a little surreal... is it wrong to say that I felt detached from the whole thing? I am not a religious person per se but I do believe that there is something there after death. I would guess you wold say I am spiritual.

As I stood listening to the words, all I could think was how much I missed him and how much I just wanted him to be there. However, I did not feel any emotional attachment to the box of ashes. It seemed so empty and I felt so empty.

The day he died, I remember the sun shining so brightly as I sat outside the hospital alone. It felt like it was him saying he was ok now. The day of his funeral there was bright sunshine, again it was like some communication. Today though, we had dull grey clouds, were standing in snow and then snow began towards the end of the service. I guess I felt disappointed, I looked for sunshine and found none. 

It's all such a strange process, in the past I have lost Grandparents but this loss is something which I can't describe or explain. Every day it is getting a little easier, but I am scared he will be forgotten and I try everything to keep him with me.

Today was not a final goodbye, it was a formality. I have not said goodbye and never will, it's more a see you later.

Miss Independent...

In my early uni days and end of school I was very much a homebody. In fact, this affected where I went to Uni and what I studied. I was leaning towards child psychology but at the time, to study the more human side would have meant a move away. This is something which I did not want to do. Therefore I stayed and completed my teaching degree (which I love).

Over the past couple of years I have became more free and independent. I have travelled solo and had some amazing experiences. Through travelling I have made new friends, been inspired, grown as a person and learnt to be happy alone. Being happy alone is so important to be, I like to spend time to myself doing what I want and having quiet moments.

Lately, I have been thinking more about me as a person and I am finally feeling ready to share my life with someone. I have spent many a years being Miss Independent and running from relationships which I felt would become serious as I believed I would be 'held beack' in some ways from doing what I want and when I want. I am now however, beginning to change.

I am beginning to want something stable. A relationship which I know would not hold me back. All my time alone has made me a lot more head strong, I know that, but I also know that there is someone out there to take that on. Someone who would be happy to be with someone who knew what they wanted.  


“Love one another and you will be happy. It’s as simple and as difficult as that."
~ Michael Leunigt.”
                                                                             


In no way am I saying I will go out and try to be in a relationship. I am happy to see what happens. I will not be the first to run or panic. I can calm down and begin to understand that just by being with a guy, my life does not have to stop. It means I have someone else to share things with. I am having a difficult time letting go of someone in my past (and he is struggling with me too) but I now feel ready for a proper relationship and this will help me gain closure with him.

Have you ever had a relationship epiphany of some sort?

Belief: Quote Link Up

Today is my first post back into my quote of the week. I have also included a link up after my post if any of you fabulous bloggers would like to share a quote too.

I have been reading a lot of quotes lately to find positivity for myself. While reading, I came across a quote I wish to share with you all today.

“You never know how much you really believe anything until its truth or falsehood becomes a matter of life and death to you. It is easy to say you believe a rope to be strong and sound as long as you are merely using it to cord a box. But suppose you had to hang by that rope over a precipice. Wouldn't you then first discover how much you really trusted it?...Only a real risk tests the reality of a belief.” 

C.S Lewis

The idea of belief is something which many people have many different feelings and thoughts on. Lately, my belief has been tested, hurt me and inspired me. How do we know what to have belief in?

In my mind, belief is a feeling of hope. A feeling which makes you think you can somehow have things happen which you want to simply because you have 'belief' in in. I always thought that through this things would be fine. Until it was tested. 

My belief in things with my brother did not happen, in fact quite the opposite. I spent many nights lying awake wondering why? Questioning my ability to believe - surely if I had believed enough in him getting better he would've right? I guess it was belief in myself and my abilities which were tested.

As time has passed I am starting to realise that it was not down to me and my belief. What happened was down to things outside my control. So what has happened to my belief in hope? It's still there and in fact it is coming back. Even during some dark times I kept telling myself that things will get better, and began to once again believe in myself - not necessarily in my ability to fix things. But in that I could help myself to feel better. No-one can experience loss and be 'fixed', I can't hope for that because that is always a something which I will fail.

I can though, help myself and begin to see some happiness in things around me again and begin to find a stable place to start from. Did I lose trust in myself? I think I did. But what I am now beginning to understand is that my belief should not be something I then punish myself for. What is life without belief? If I trust it and it fails, I move on to the next part. I just have to make sure I never lose the belief and hope I have in myself.

I want to leave you with this quote:

“I believe in everything until it's disproved. So I believe in fairies, the myths, dragons. It all exists, even if it's in your mind. Who's to say that dreams and nightmares aren't as real as the here and now?”  

John Lennon

Has your belief or hope ever been tested? What kept you going?

My blog...

It's Sunday Social time with Neely and Ashley . Today is all about your own blog.

 

1. What is the name of your blog? How long have you been blogging?
My blog is - If it's not ok, then it's not the end. I have now been blogging for just over 2 years.

2. Why do you blog?
I love to write and through blogging I have areason to write and gather my thoughts. If I can inspire and help others then that's even better!

3. What is the first blog you ever followed?
I think one of the first blogs I ever followed was Kym over at Travel Babbles and still to this day I love her posts!

4. What is your favorite post you wrote in 2012?
One of my favourite was, 'So I began to write..' This is when I started to think about the year and how much I needed to start changing things. I also managed to get out of a blogging rut with this one.

5. What are your blogging goals for 2013?
To keep sharing with you all. As of now, the year has seemed to have set off at a pace so much faster than I anticipated so I have found time difficult to find. Once I settle I will be back into my blogging routine. I am hoping to write in more areas apart from just my blog.

6. Top 3 favorite blogs to follow? 

Rebecca :  Forever after Undecided

I love this blog and in 'real life' she is one of my best friends too. We met through blogging and ever since we've been the best of friends.

 

Adrian - Happy Girls Are The Prettiest

Her blog is so inspirational and makes me wish I was fitter!

 

Kym - Travel Babbles

I like to hear Kym's honesty as she travels through life and to new places!

 

Happy Sunday! Have you been up to anything nice today? 

Oh...there you are...

I have had a week back at work after my Christmas Break and I feel like I have been MIA. Not only have I still had my 'germ friends' hanging around me, but I have also being absolutely swampped at work. Through the usual day to day classroom jobs, to my co-ordinator roles and the feeling of exhaustion it has been quite a week. 

It is now the weekend and I hope to get ahead of myself so that next week I can at least claim at least a couole of evenings I can claim to myself. That also means I can get back to my little blog too!

Do any teachers out there have some tips on how to  keep your workload to school?

Sunday Social Link Up...

I'm linking up with Neely and Ashley for some Sunday Social loving!

Head on over to their sites to join in the fun.

Q&A

1. Do you plan to change any of your eating habits in the new year?
I really should... anyone who knows me laments my lack of fruit and vegetable intake. 
 
2. Any workout tips to get us back in shape after the Holidays? 
Work out for YOU and not because it's a resolution. You will only end up hating whatever regime you have going on. Also, do something you enjoy! 

My workout of choice. Fun and tones like nothing else.

3. Favourite thing you did over the Holidays? 
Spending time with me beautiful family.

4. What is something you hope that you accomplish in 2013 that you did not in 2012? 
I would like to be in a healthy relationship without a toxic boy!

5. Name 3 things happening this year you are excited about and why: 
 Miss Twin is getting married - I love her and she is so happy. What better reasons?
Continuing friendships with some amazing people in my life. 
Getting back to my blog - it's been a tough year but 2013 will only get better!

Doctor, doctor...

It's a new year and so far it hasn't treated me as well as I hoped. Being ill just makes me feel a little off kilter and not ready to see the possibilities of the new year.Also, Dr Google has correctly (obviously, everything is the truth on the Internet) diagnosed me with both sinusitis, glandular fever and flu. Who needs a real life doctor?

You can always get an appointment with Dr Google... {source}

I am however planning a few changes in my life and in the blog sense. It wont be the layout because I quite like the look I have but there will be a few new things for you all. I know I've been rather up and down posting this past few months but I'm ready to blog it out again. 

I want to say a big thank you to those readers who have came back and started to join me on my journey once again. That and your lovely comments are very much appreciated and put a smile on my face! 

Please tell me I am not the only one to have turned to Dr Google for advice?

My new best friends...

I have acquired some friends from the 'Germ' family unfortunately. They appear to enjoy hanging out with me much to my lack of happiness at this. I have been unwell for a good 7 weeks with a chest infection and cough which seemed to be finally passing into a simple cold. Well two weeks later and my new little friends have well and truly taken up residence in my head and body. 

"Just wanted to say hi..."

What do they like to do? Well, at 4am this morning they decided it would be fun to bounce around my head. I like to think I'm pretty tough, and I normally handle illness quite well, but this time round I am starting to struggle.

After two lots of antibiotics at the end of last year and various over the counter tablets, I can not seem to shake these little pests. It would appear they like my body and will be difficult to get rid of. So, until then I will be feeling sorry for myself and trying to freeze out the germs and hope they take the hint.

Do you have any natural remedies to share with me?

10 things you should know about me...

After reading Kym's blog post over at Travel Babbles, I decided to share some facts about myself.

Even though I blog anonymously, I still like to try and share as much of myself and my life that I can with you all. So, with that in mind here is a list of 10 facts about me:

1: I am somewhat OCD and have routines for putting my make up on to eating certain food items.
2: I often dance in the kitchen when waiting for the kettle to boil.
3: Whiskey makes me insane...but I drink it anyway- thank you NYC!
4: I like to be alone but know that others are close if I want them.
5: I am scared of crumpets and the underside of mushrooms. 
6: I use Google to find out how to spell words.
7: I use ! after every sentence in texts. 
8: If I hear a noise in the night, I don't open my eyes in case I see a ghost.
9: I am easily addicted to things but lose interest extremely fast due to my short concentration span.
10: I have conversations with myself and pretend conversations with others in my head. A lot. 

Be you ... always.

There are many more but I thought I'd try share the least crazy things about me for now as not to scare away any new readers. But it's a little bit of me to help you understand me more.

What fact would share with me?

Two...

Today is a milestone I was not sure I would reach. 

 Today is my blog's 2nd birthday.

Another year older...

I have now been blogging for 2 years, incredible of what? Over the two years feel like I have grown so much in my life. I am finding my place in life and learning how to be a driven woman in my late twenties. It is not always the easiest thing to be but I feel like I am getting the hang of it slowly but surely.

This next part is going to be hard but to link in with turning two, I am going to choose a blog post from my 1st and 2nd year to recap and share with you all. 

Aged 1 

Blog Post - You were more important than you realise...

I have chosen this blog post from February 2011 because looking back on it, it has even more meaning than when I first wrote it. In the time since that post, I have found this to have been a sentence which I've felt like uttering a number of times. I have had a number of people come in and out of my life since that post. As I've always believed, people come into our lives for a reason and whether that be big and small, there is always a reason. 

A number of special people are, and were, more important than they realised. However, as I grow wiser older, I 've realised this is such a hard thing to say. Why this is I can't say. Surely something so positive and lovely would be easy to share but I still have those walls up which I struggle to knock down. Cherish those around you and learn from them. Remember, maybe you're more important than you realise to others? I just hope one day that I will be able to share these thoughts with people more freely.

Aged 2

Blog Post - No one's getting out of here alive...

I have chosen this blog because it sums up my entire year. I will not go over things again. Just know that this moment in my life can only make me stronger. There will always be a sadness and a feeling that something is missing. However, in time, this will lessen and my happy memories will begin to give me something back. It was not a goodbye, it was just a see you later. Love always to you Big Bro.

Thank you to all you for reading and sharing my life. How long have you been blogging for now?

New Year, New Reflections...

Happy New Year!

This New Year has been somewhat bittersweet for me. I am grateful for my family and friends around me and I spent New Year being happy which is not something I thought was going to be possible. At the turn of midnight I thought of my brother and how much I missed him but how happy he would be to see me smiling.

When a new year begins, you inevitably look back on what has passed and looking back over 2012 has not been the easiest. It is hard to reflect back on a year where you had such little control of big situations. What I can say, hand on heart, is that I have developed a strength which I didn't think I had. I can think of a particular moment when I thought that that was that. It was a moment where I sat and thought, this is it - I can't carry on anymore. I genuinely wondered if, at the moment, I was having an actual breakdown.

Given the weight on my shoulders it would not have surprised me one bit. Between grief, sadness, work and my own issues there was not much else I could take. I pulled myself together, got one with things and carried on my life. As I previously mentioned, I found a strength I did not know I had. Life can be so generous in some moments but in others it deals a cruel hand. I have been on the receiving end of this but now I have to look forward. I can not let the past ruin me and make me feel so inconsolable. 

How long it will take me to move past this feeling I don't know. What I can say is that today I woke up feeling positive and that things can and will get better. I may not have control of everything but I can take control of my mind again. 2013 is not going to be easy, there will be more firsts without my beloved brother but there will also be new firsts for me as a growing woman trying to my way in this world.

To start my new year I have completed my 2012 inventory. If you're new to my blog, this is what started this little piece of the internet which is all mine. I am not one for setting resolutions but I feel reflection is important to help me grow and continue with the successful parts of my life and find ways to improve areas which don't quite work. So, with that is mind, here are my reflections from the year:


My 2012 Inventory

In 2012, I gained a strength I never knew I was capable of.

I lost one of my big brother's to cancer. 

I stopped believing in things being ok.

I started to have faith in myself.

I was hugely satisfied by staying strong when all I wanted to do was fall apart.

And frustrated by life and how it can change so quickly.

I am so embarrassed that I still can not be stringer when it comes to a certain person in my life.

Once again, I let work take over my life on far too many occasions. 

Once again, I accepted behaviour which I should not.

The biggest physical difference between me last December and this December is my eyes and weight. My eyes still hold a certain sadness from the events of the year. I want my smile to reach them again. I've also lost weight through stress.

The biggest psychological difference between me last December and this December is that I am at a low point in my mind and life. I need to find some happiness in the new year and begin to pull myself out of my black hole.

I loved my big brother unconditionally, my family and friends.

Why did I spend even two minutes thinking I was making the wrong decision to travel solo?

I should have spent more time sleeping...again.

I regret nothing. 

I will never regret spending lots of time with my amazing brother.

I worry about the small things way too much.

I didn’t spend enough time looking after my body and mind.

Stress nearly drove me crazy.

The most relaxing place I went was South Molle Island - The Whitsunday Islands in Australia.

Why did I not say I love you to my brother the last day I spoke to him properly...you never know how quick life will go.

The best thing I did for someone else was be there and support them with love through their hard times and give comfort through their suffering.

The best thing I did for myself was spend the summer in Australia.

The best thing someone did for me was was to be there and support me through some extremely tough moments and worked to make me smile again.

The one thing I’d like to do again, but do it better, is to continue to be honest and open with as many people as I can and live the life I want to live.

(Fill-in-the-blank template from Mary Schmich at The Chicago Tribune)

*My words from the year...

What were your biggest achievements of 2012?

* Made using wordle