Today is the 25th March.
There is nothing to make it stand out from any other day for most people in the world, but for me this is a day that has changed. Today would have been my big brother's birthday - he would have been 44 years old. But instead he has been out of my life for nearly 5 months. Instead of celebrating and sending a witty, funny card, I am sitting thinking about the fact that I will never get to celebrate anything with him in person again - or even see him again. This time last year, I spent with him and my brother, ordering take away and talking about how well he was looking and how he was making good progress in the recovery from cancer.
Little did we all know that it was terminal. A fact he did not share with anyone except our Dad, for fear of us stopping our lives for him. That takes bravery - something he was very good at for the whole year. I will cry and I will feel sad but I need to find a way to celebrate his life - because for 27 of his 43 years he was my big brother and I love him. That is something to celebrate and be happy about. I had him in my life and I am proud of the man he was.
I'll always remember him, with some sadness of course, but as each year passes I will find more peace with it. I will raise a vodka to him and try to keep a smile on my face.
To my big brother, I love you always - Happy birthday! x x
5 comments:
I'm very sorry for your loss. Even though a person may no longer be with us, their love continues to surround us.
Missy, know that your brother smiles at you everyday ... and on his birthday he is celebrating with you! He is forever in your heart, thoughts and memories. He may have been your big brother , but you were his little sister and he continues to watch over you. Many blessings to you ..xo HHL
I'm so sorry for you loss. Your brother sounds like a very brave man.
Im sorry for your loss! Your brother sounds like an amazing man! Let his memories bring you comfort and smiles!
andshecanconquertheworld.blogspot.com
Nay <3
@ Julia - Thank you - that means a lot :-)
@Celia - Yes, I have never thought about it that way. I know he will be happy for me.
@Becky - He was... an inspiration to me.
@Tanay - Thanks Tanay, his memories are what keep me going :-)
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